Dear Mother
By Naje Badu Love
I recently completed the 21-Day Abundance Meditation challenge which encompassed a combination of journaling tasks and approximately 15 minutes of meditation - all to be completed each day in a twenty-one-day stretch. Nevertheless, the practice created quite a few shifts in my perception and heightened many of the awarenesses I’d previously held throughout the majority of my life. One of them being my occasional inclination to align my thoughts and feelings with sentiments of fear and lack, rather than maintaining a mindset of love and abundance any time I encountered uncertainty. I am a pretty optimistic individual. Most times, I attempt to see the silver-lining in circumstances, especially those that are disheartening. Also, I do my best to see God's love in the eyes of everyone I meet - even when they display choices and behaviors that counteract my endeavor to practice loving kindness. And now, more than ever, I do whatever I can to elevate my consciousness in such a way that I am enabled to move through certain circumstances despite the presence of negativity. Each day I grow stronger in my aspiration to move through the fear “any way.” Even these written words are a testament to me moving through the fear of being criticized. I am choosing, instead, to share my thoughts, feelings, and vulnerability while at the same time maintaining my focus on all that is possible.
Truth be told, I meditate and journal on a regular basis, so the journaling aspect of the challenge wasn’t extremely difficult. The shift for me occurred during part of the challenge that encouraged me to address parts of myself that have remained unhealed, unlived, unforgiven, or even bound by a state of unworthiness - both consciously and unconsciously. As the days of the challenge went on, I was able to uncover some suppressed emotions about events, things and people I thought I’d long since released or forgiven. So it was good to trace back from where blockage that often arises in my life stems, especially with respect to the flow of abundance in and out of life. There is so much to say about the meditation challenge that I encourage everyone to participate in it. No, this is not an endorsement. My whole intention is to build and uplift. So make sure to Google the 21 Day Meditation on Abundance by the Chopra Center.
Anyhow, the challenge is not the entire focus of this essay, but the amazing exercise that I engaged in as a result of my participation is. For that reason, I feel inclined to send loving vibrations out to Deepak Chopra for including it in his beautifully orchestrated process of increasing awareness of the abundance that exists. Even now, I am brought to tears just thinking about it. In concert with being reminded that we are all connected spiritually (whether we as humans choose to believe or act as such is an entirely different reality). However, the exercise was focused solely on the concept of unity. Deepak says, “When we begin to fully understand this concept of life in unity, the idea of a personal ‘I’ gives way to the image of a Universal ‘I’. The concept of rivalry and competition disappears.” Chopra goes on to state that when fear, lack, and competition are replaced with love, empathy, and inclusion, a deeper experience of solidarity, of relating with compassion and care, will begin to present itself.
Admittedly, the surge of exhilaration and awe that came over me the moment I read the daily challenge assigned for day eighteen was unlike anything I’d previously encountered. Overcome by what felt like a cloud of uncertainty, I found it difficult to wrap my mind around being asked to write a letter to my country of origin that included my feelings about its existence. Just the thought of writing a letter to Mother Africa stirred a multitude of emotions. Initially, it sounded like a superfluous task, like something interesting to do to pass the time. Yet, as the assignment began to resonate in my spirit, I experienced a level of excitement mixed with some sadness, confusion, anger, and gratitude. In fact, it took several moments before I could actually sit with all of those emotions and accept them simply as they were. You see, I had to accept that there is a root cause to why each of those emotions were triggered. After taking a breath, and allowing my thoughts to center, I hugged myself as a gesture of forgiveness. I reached for the repressed parts of myself deep within to quiet what felt like the remnants of pain. I felt agony softly urging me to bypass the task and move on to the next without completion. While sitting with the wound in my soul, I requested the hidden parts of myself to speak. I picked up a pen, took a breath, exhaled and allowed my spirit to express itself on the pages of my journal. This is what resonated as my emotions flowed through my pen:
Grief. Unworthiness. Being unwanted. Sentiments of anger and betrayal resonated at the thought of the African mothers, fathers, brothers, and sisters who didn’t fight harder for the descendants who were captured and enslaved. The thought of having a watered-down version of culture, heritage, and spirituality, due to being robbed of the original version made me sad. Shaking the reality of being separated and alienated from my forefathers, getting rid of the feeling of being forgotten was hard. My confusion is two-fold as I have yet to develop a sense of belonging in America, yet if I were to return to the Motherland I don’t feel like I’d be embraced there. Not to mention, being a woman of a lighter hue, I am not so easily accepted in my African American community. So, to be honest, I have no idea where in Africa my life journey is rooted.
After sitting with my feelings for several minutes, I realized that my response was coming from an ego-centered perspective. It suddenly hit me to shift my perspective slightly and contemplate writing the letter from a Universal “I” perspective, as Deepak Chopra suggested. Once I opted to expand my perspective to a space beyond my personal sentiments (not that they aren’t valid), that’s when I recognized the opportunity to form solidarity with each and every person on the planet. I’ll expound on that in just a moment.
I began to grow excited at the thought of writing a letter to Mother Africa as I could suddenly recognize an opportunity to be seen, heard, and validated, even if only in spirit. I understood that my words could speak on behalf of every one of us who are descendants of enslaved Africans. A letter afforded me an opportunity to reunite with the Mother from whose bosom we were ripped away hundreds of years ago. On behalf of a nation, I could serve as a liaison of “connection reparation” and forge a path of healing and forgiveness. I began to see the letter to Mother Africa as a way to spark and unleash a revolution that would compel each of us to rise in our power to create, move, organize, and demand the rights we inherited, such as freedom, peace, equality, and the inalienable right to be happy.
Since I considered this journaling exercise to be one of the most compelling I’ve ever engaged in, I thought I would share it with you. The assignment did not require that I write a novel that included my emotional response to an entire historical account of my ascendance from African soil, but rather that I conjure my emotions and to write them in a journal. Vulnerability is a step in the process of daring to be great. So, without further adieu, here is my letter to Mother Africa:
(To be continued…Dear Mother Africa)
STAY CONNECTED:
Naje Badu Love is the author of Let Go of Your But! A Woman’s Guide to Loving Herself to Full Potential and Possibility (purchase here). As an artist and illustrator, Naje founded Journal Up! (an organization designed to support people in their quest for true potential through journaling). to align her passion for writing, journaling and illustration as a means of connecting with and inspiring people around the globe. You are invited to reach out to her via Facebook and LinkedIn by following the social media details below:
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